to die is gain...

Well, I am back from Jesus Culture. WOW! Shocked. Amazed. Awestruck wonder. God is amazing. There is no way to put complete words and descriptions for my encounter. My change. My renewal. I thought I knew God. I had an idea. I had a category to describe Him. The truth is, I didn't know Him at all. He is so expansive and so great. I encountered His presence, allowed it to fall on me. God moved and I was still. 


I always thought a great worship service was as far as He went. The quiet moments in my room was God. He would speak I listened. I only really heard from Him when I wanted to. I truly found God. I sought after Him with my while heart and found Him. It wasn't a great service with a great speaker. It was a transformation. It was an encounter with the Creator. The baptism of fire. Purging me, taking me and replacing the Spirit of the living God. The Holy Spirit overtaking, overwhelming and empowering. God moved. I received. 


I know what it means to no longer live and have Christ alive in me. This is not me who lives, it is God. It is the true connection and intimacy we talk about and think about. It's the union of my soul with the Spirit. I am truly immersed in Him. I feel Him now. It's like everything exists. It's a connection to God. Like life literally is flowing out of me. The Spirit is so part of everything. I understand my empty idols. I understand why my passions were misplaced into movies and books. Why I gave over a passion to them. I didn't have passion for God. M passions have changed. My heart burns to be in His presence. To be led by Him. To be His devoted child. My heart has come alive, my passion is ten times more than it ever was, but it is all focused on the One who loves me dearly and tenderly and furiously. 


My God deserves all praise. He deserves all love. He deserves me. He has me, that is it. I am a living sacrifice. I am taking up my cross. I am running closer and closer to God and I will knock down anything and anyone who gets in my way. I won't be silenced or quieted. If my passion makes people uncomfortable then my silence will torment me. I can't be silent or still. I was made to move, to touch, and to love.

brighter than the whitest smile...

"I will betroth you to Me forever; Yes, I will betroth you to Me in righteousness and justice, in lovingkindess and mercy; I will betroth you to Me in faithfulness, and you shall know the Lord."- Hosea 2:19-20

Can you say, AMEN? Wow! MY God is sealing me to Him. Nothing will separate us! Think about what our relationship is- righteousness, justice, loving kindness, mercy, and faithfulness! That is what I call a perfect union. A perfect love. A deepening love with no end. I love this verse, it pulls at my heart. My Savior didn't just save me, doesn't just care for me, He is madly in love with me. Sinful dirty me! WOW!

Christ looks at each of us with a longing desire. We are His chosen Bride. He desires to be as close as possible. This verse in Hosea portrays a God who doesn't want just friendship, He wants a sealed and sanctified relationship. One more sacred and more beautiful marriage. OH! Church, wake up! There is a passionate Father who desires more than a lifted hand or a dutiful pen signing a check. He desires a passionate, furious loving child. The world is full of darkness, and we are the light bearers! Made in the image of an almighty God. We have the power and the words to conquer darkness with the loving light that shines bright within. Stop hiding the light with sin, with the stains of a confused and lost world. Shine like a bride! Shine like a newly engaged young woman. Shine with light and love.

even better than the yellow brick road

I am crazy excited about tomorrow. Well, very soon it will be today! haha. Ok, Jesus Culture! I am heading up to Redding tomorrow for an absolutely amazing conference. Basically, thousands of young people coming with a passion to have God move in them to reach their cities. Yeah, I believe God will rock the house. I just can't get over how personal He is. Right now, as I type, He is with me. Preparing me for everything He wants to tell me. Can there be anything better? No, most definitely not.

Our access to God the Father is astounding. How can I not be in awe of Him? He is always wanting my attention. He is always focused on me. The Spirit is always ready and telling me what's next. What an adventurous life I have ahead of me! I have one now!!! I just want to praise His name. The Savior is my love. My life is an offering. I just want to be wherever He is leading because I don't want to be away from Him.

I will try to write while I am there. May not be easy since I can't take my laptop... anyways. I pray for the fire of Heaven to consume us like a passion and that we bring back a fresh new blazing love to pour on this city! HECK YES!

this isn't no judge judy...

Ok. So, I have decided to read the book of Judges. Not going to lie, this is not an easy read. I finished chapter 3 today and man, this is some good stuff. I am excited for chapter 4 and if I didn't have work in a half hour, I would read it right now! (Deborah is in chapter 4.. can you say girl power? haha. kidding. no really, we rock). Anyways, I am still hooked on chapter 2. Chapter 2 verse 22 was powerful. It gave me insight into my own life. 

God made the decision to allow the Israelites to be tested because of their disobedience. At first that makes no sense at all in my head. However, I looked back over my own rebellion and there times I doubted the existence of God. Just like God left Israel, I think He had had left me to be tested. I walked through some serious pain, but today I can shout for praise because Christ has redeemed me. I am covered by the blood of the Lamb. Now, that is rad. 

God is so amazing! He knows us better than anyone else. Just like in Judges, He saw the hearts of His children and He knew what it would take for them to wake up and stop bowing down to their false gods. God knew exactly what I had to walk through, He knew my rebellion was there and He let me hit the point where I knew without a doubt, I couldn't make it another day unless I had Him.

I am amazed to this day of His love. I am amazed and excited to know I have an inheritance with Christ. I didn't find myself in the middle of a party life style. I found my true self at the feet of Christ, where His grace and love flow freely to all who want it. 

whoa! who?

"When all that generation had been gathered to their fathers, another generation arose after them who did not know the Lord nor the work which He had done for Israel." -Judges 2:10

Wow, how amazing is that example right their. So many times, as a young person I have let my parents walk with God be mine. God desires each of us personally. It is so important to know where we are headed. No one can grow my faith other than me. There are so many parents in the church who fail to be open and transparent to their children. They feel their children will just get God and then be good. The truth is that we are each responsible for our own relationship. 

As a young woman preparing for my life, I hope to become a mother who allows her children to know God on their own from such a young age. Not just know about God, but to know Him and be known by Him. To teach them to spend time with God on their own. 

What I learned this morning was that my own individual walk is so essential to my life. My life is not my own. I am a child of the Most High God. How can I not know Him? I feel myself drawn to my Savior more than ever. I pray you find your walk genuine and full His love and grace.

this walk in the park...

Yeah, God is awesome in my opinion. My life has been such an amazing roller coaster or confusion and excitement. I am saved by grace and headed on my journey. I believe with all my being my Father in Heaven has a plan for me and He is going to rock my socks off. Sometimes, the thoughts in my head become too many. I journal everyday because my mind is constantly on God and what He is doing in my life. I am always learning and thirsting for more of Him.

I am finally restarting my whole blog. This is my journey of growth, and unfortunately, setbacks. A great man once said, "God is more concerned with process than He is with the results." Thank goodness! Because, sometimes my process takes a long time due to my stubbornness.  Luckily, I serve a gracious loving God who cares more for me than anything else in this world. I am chosen and set aside for a great purpose.

Heart. Mind. Soul. All for God.